“Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.”
1 Peter 5:7 NIV
What a weekend it has been. Are you ever amazed at how much happens in one day? If your life is as crazy as mine, you are probably in awe at how much happens in an hour. Then again, it must work this very same way, but in reverse, if you have a calm life. You must be trying to find ways to wile away the hours if your life is slow. I have recently been amazed at how many of God’s ways seem like juxtapositions. Having just left hospital earlier this week, you wouldn’t think it possible that I would have gone out to lunch with the girls and my best friend—it’s another one of life’s opposites.
Today was filled with the good and the bad, the beautiful and the ugly. God brings it all together—for after all, He is the same yesterday, today, and forever. He is the Ancient of Days and yet He is making everything new. My mom just got out of the hospital herself as well. After having had such a beautiful time at lunch, a short phone call with her left me feeling frustrated and dejected. She wanted to stop taking medications I feel she needs. Now, I am all for the natural remedies, but I feel that there are times in which a bit more than just natural remedies are warranted. I sometimes think back to before I decided to get the new infusions I am currently getting. I had gone to see a doctor who wrote me off; she basically told me that I needed nothing—that I simply needed some antacids. But then, another doctor took a chance and gave me this new infusion—a medication that, as harsh as it is, has given me a new lease on life. I’ve been told repeatedly that taking medicine or going to the doctors is some sort of sign that I’m lacking—lacking for righteousness, lacking trust in God, lacking faith in and of itself. What I see is that I am simply lacking health. And yet the Lord sustains me. If I had listened to the doctor who thought fixing my heartburn would somehow solve all of my problems, perhaps I wouldn’t have had today—a simple day in which I did what others take for granted; I went to eat In-N-Out with my kids. I ate out—at an actual table—at an actual restaurant! When you live a life like mine, and your days are spent in cancer centers and hospital rooms, that small sense of normalcy—that simple moment—is something you cling to. You hold on to it as if your life depended on it. If I had listened to the doubt—to that voice in my head saying “Maybe they’re right. Maybe I need to stop taking the medications. Maybe God doesn’t want me to use medicine.” But what if God is the one using the medicines? What if that is what He provides? What if that is how He is giving my broken body strength? I thank God for His Holy Spirit that guides and protects. I thank God for the Father who always knows best. I thank God for His son who understands our weaknesses. Thank God for night and day. And just for today. I see God as using many of life’s juxtapositions to bring forth healing.
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